Because Of Love

She placed the now empty glass on the table and turned to face him with a scrutinizing gaze. If he was so aware of her reservations, why the hell had unilaterally decided that moving into her shoebox of an apartment, where she couldn’t avoid him, was a genius response to her evicting him just the day before after having this very same conversation?© 2024 Nôv/el/Dram/a.Org.

Suddenly, he was right in front of her, not pressed against her but caging her. She took a step back, her back bumping against the counter that made up part of the kitchen. His feet didn’t move from where he stood but his arms came to rest palm flat on top of the counter, bracketing her. He leaned forward, over her, his lips inches away from her forehead. Her breath snagged in her throat as she was made aware, yet again, how big he was. Muscled in a lean kind of way, wide shoulders and a large chest that she would have loved to cuddle against in a different circumstance and corded thick arms that made her fingers itch with the need to touch them. She swallowed hard, biting the inside of her lower lip as her breath came a little harder. The way he surrounded her, his warmth enveloped her, making her body burn. This wasn’t good. She needed to get away from him before they had a repeat of last night. But how to get out of this situation? She didn’t dare look up at what she was sure were eyes bearing a fire that would singe her with his dark desires. The moment she did, it would be a lost battle for control of her own body.

“Being together,” he said, swaggering from side to side as his feet shifted forward one after the other, bringing him closer to her.

Talia stuck her fidgety fingers into her back shorts pocket before they reached out and touched him. She inhaled a shuddering breath, her chest swelling with hope and dared the question, “As what?”

Silence. Her eyes shifted up from his chest to his mouth as she wondered if the distraction he posed made her miss his response. Sensual firm, his lips remained pressed together in a relaxed manner, but the tick in his jaw bellied aloofness. The implication of his silence was like jumping into a lake in the middle of winter.

Heated, for a whole different reason, she freed her hands, pressed them against his chest and pushed. He barely barged from the force but clearly reading into the action, he dropped his arms and took a step back from her.

“What exactly are you trying to say without offending me? What exactly did we do? What exactly do you want? Sex, to fuck or make love?”

“I’m not sure yet.”

That response was too honest a strain to the already threading ropes anchoring her castle in the clouds to the ground. It snapped and her breaking heart waved the fantasy goodbye.

She loosed a humorless sharp crack of laughter, throwing her hands up at the inane response. “Of course not.” It wasn’t bloody rocket science, it was practically a yes or no question. And yet, here he was. “But the uncertainty didn’t stop you from coming here, did it?”

“Talia, you’re not just a physical release.”

“Not just? I should be relieved. Then what am I just?”

“You are an oasis.”

The soft way he said that, his full disarming sensual mouth forming each word with wisps of fantasy woven together made her body feel light on her feet. Exactly how a balloon rose off the ground after being pumped full of hot air. Damn Talia, no wonder he thinks you’re easy. With cupid’s arrow, she punctured a hole in the damn thing and it quickly sunk to the ground.

“Save the pretty words for someone who hasn’t seen all seasons of you,” she rebuked, turning away from him and giving him her back.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re the genius billionaire businessman, figure it out,” she gritted out through clenched teeth, wishing she was anywhere else but there at that very moment.

“Talia,” he called demandingly behind her, but she didn’t dare turn around.

She felt his hand wrapped around her upper arm and a zing of awareness shot through her. Even mad this man’s touch did things to her. She turned then, extracting herself from his grasp.

“You’re using me like some treatment,” she snapped, slipping past him, careful to keep distance between them, but that didn’t stop his fresh clean scent from reaching out to her.

“Am I an opportunist? Yes, but I’m not a bastard. For months I felt like I couldn’t breathe, then you happened and then all of a sudden, I felt alive again. I want you and I intend on keeping you.”

If he hadn’t added that Neanderthal part, she would have been elated, instead of just half elated and very much pissed off. “I think I’ve told you once before that I’m not your pet.”

With a sad smile he said, “If only it were that simple.”

Desperation stained the weariness in his voice like red wine on a white dress. It was too stark to ignore, and yet she couldn’t allow herself to trust it. He wasn’t just any man. Rafael DeLuca was a man who guarded his emotions and expressions like a vault in the Pentagon and only let people see what he wanted them to see. She couldn’t blindly trust what he allowed her to see. But she wanted to, she desperately wanted to.

Experience told her that she should be backing away from him, as the man moved like a panther on the hunt, but at the moment, she wanted to be sure he was taking the persona of a sly or slithering kind. She examined what she expected to be his impassive mask but one look in his eyes and all his emotions were there for her to see. Confusion, need, desperation. He wasn’t hiding from her anymore. The mask was off. Truths, lies, half-truths she would be able to tell them all every time he spoke. He was open to her. Only with her. Her heart leaped in her chest and yet a sadness fell over her like a dark cloud before a storm. Should I feel special now?

“Rafe, don’t…” she trailed off weakly as he stroked one finger down her jaw, tipping her head up. She closed her eyes waiting, barely breathing in anticipation.

“I want you Talia,” he rasped, a breath away from her lips. The way he called her name in a deep and husky voice, sent shivers through her. “That’s probably the only thing I’m sure of. Do I lust for you? Yes, I’m never going to deny that. Right at this moment, I want to ravish you until there is nothing left of us. But, this time round, it has to be your decision. Everything else aside, do you want me as much as I want you?”

She felt the empty space immediately he stepped away and opened her eyes. She watched his back as he walked away and right into the bedroom. If he only knew how much she wanted him. How much she wanted to forget everything and just live in the now.