ENDS

Iris’s p. o. v.

” I’m gonna get some groceries, you wanna come?” Megan asks as she throws on a baby blue tank top.

I slowly shake my head as I stayed rooted in the spot I had been laying since last night.

Megan’s eye’s clearly turn into one of sadness as she watched me. I didn’t want that pity but sometimes in life you don’t get what you want.

” Iris, I really don’t know what to do. I’m confused and really broken at this, I don’t even know if I’m trying well enough but I know we’ll get through this” she says as she leans in to give me a comforting hug.

I don’t reply her words, but I’m only believing them.

” I’ll be back soon, okay?” She says again and walks out the door, shutting it behind her.

I finally feel the dawn of loneliness on me and unknowingly, my tears began to escape once again.

I couldn’t help it, I’ve tried but I just couldn’t. I can’t stomach the feeling that my baby is out there. My tiny, fragile baby is somewhere out there.

Using my pillow to quieten my cries before a knock sounded on the door.

As usual, I wipe my face quickly and inhale sharp breath before responding.

” Come in”

A little shuffling comes from behind the door before it was slowly opened and Dylan walks in, holding his phone by his ear with a semi amused look on his face.

“She’s right here” he says and pauses for a while like he’s listening to the receiver. That was when he spared me a glance and realized that I had been crying, if the way his features collapsed when he saw me was anything to go by.

“Alright ” came his next response as he hands me the phone. Out of confusion I collect it and he whispers Meredith, that was when I figured out who’s on the other end.

“Hello?” I start as Dylan takes a seat by my side and places a silent kiss to my temple.

“Sugar plum how are you?” Meredith called into cellphone as I recall how much I’ve actually missed her voice.

” I’m fine I guess, what about you?”

” I am so not fine in any way. I’ve been trying to get through to you since I saw the news but your number has been out of service, so I called Dylan and he said you lost your phone in the house. I’ve been scared shitless !”

Her reaction on the phone got me imagining an over dramatic Meredith gasping for air while using her right five fingers to impersonate a fan.

And believe it or not… it got me laughing.

From my side view, I could see that Dylan was satisfied seeing Meredith make me smile. I was actually glad too.

” I’m alive Mer.. it’s okay ”

” oh please spare me all the ‘ I’m fine but not totally fine but I’ll lie to you that I’m fine so you wouldn’t pity me even though I love you so much’ talk.. I’m heading down to New York first thing tomorrow morning, I’ve already booked my flight so don’t even think about convincing me that there’s no need to show up, understand?”

With a slight smile, I responded ” I can’t wait to see you then” and I meant it.

” that’s the spirit. Tell Dylan he’s a nut head for me. Take care of yourself okay hun? It’s gonna be alright ”

” I will. Thanks Mer”

” Always at your service love. Goodbye ”

” Bye” afterwards I heard the beep.

“It’s a relief to see that you can still smile ” Dylan speaks up with a little smile on his lips.

” Mer says you’re a nut head” and I gladly delivered the message.

So, he was virtually shocked at the message but why should he be? It’s Meredith we’re talking about here.

” what exactly is my offense?”

” when she arrives tomorrow morning you’d ask her then” after sending him a brief shrug, I leaned into him to rest my head on his shoulder.

” Remind me to stay outdoors till she’s gone ” he groans and it causes me to chuckle a little.

” That sounds like a code for ‘I can’t wait to see her’ ” I teased and craned my neck to look at his face just to see his expression but he was already looking at me.

Then softly, he laughed and spoke again.

” I actually can’t wait but Meredith is a pest. I love her but I could also kill her”

His statement sent two of us into a temporary trance of laughter as my mind plays all the times I’ve heard Meredith say she’s gonna kill Dylan over the phone.

Then a little thought came to me.

” Why didn’t you and Meredith ever date? I mean you’ve gone on a date once before, if I recall properly ”

At first he was silent, but I patiently waited for his reply.

He exhaled a deep breath before responding.

” It didn’t just work out I guess”

” that’s not an explanation ”

” I don’t know.. we went on the date but realized that we’re better off as friends. I literally told this to Megan before she set up the date. I don’t like Meredith that way and I’m sure she feels the same way too”

And that was when his statement went wrong.

Meredith liked Dylan. She had always had a crush on him even while we dated but cause we’re friends she hid it pretty well.

That was the reason Megan and I had set them up on a date, to see if something would spark up. But when we called Mer after the date she claimed it went like a casual dinner would. He didn’t even kiss her or anything.

Megan was definitely pissed off that her efforts didn’t work. She even promised to castrate him on our behalf but I guess our pleas were helpful.

Now that I think of it, Dylan hadn’t dated any girl after we did. He’d always say he wasn’t interested or she wasn’t his type or worse, she likes classical music.

At a point I had thought he was gay but he actually isn’t.

And he doesn’t even act like he’s searching for a companion or something.

” Dylan?” I called out, breaking our momentarily period of silence whilst he stroked my hair.

” hmm?”

” can I ask you a question?”

” shoot” he says and adjusts his sitting position a bit, so that I could lean onto him completely.

” After you and I dated, did you date anyone else?”

I really don’t know what he found amusing in my question but he actually chuckled. A soft, light and utterly strange chuckle.

Despite his distracting laughter, I could feel his body tense and go rigid.

” what’s so funny?” I asked with a hint of confusion and curiosity in my voice.

” why did you ask that?”

He replied my question with a question. Dylan only does that when he’s trying to avoid the topic.

” Because I wanna know. You shouldn’t really be single, I think that’s illegal somewhere in the law” even though I was pretty serious about what I had said, re-running it through my mind made it sort of amusing.This is from NôvelDrama.Org.

” Well… you really wanna know why?” He jests and I feel him ease off from his alerted composure.

” I wouldn’t ask if I really didn’t ”

He took a deep breath for the second time this evening and sighed while releasing it.

” let’s put it like this. I actually do like someone. Like really really like her”

I couldn’t stop the smile that found its way to my lips. He actually does like someone that’s why he’s not interested in others.

But then why isn’t he dating her? Is he hiding her from us or???

” okay… are you guys dating?”

” Nah.. we’re not”

” why!? She could slip from your hands if you don’t do something quick ”

He laughed once again and I rose up from my half laid position to look him square in the eye and know why he’s avoiding this talk.

It’s unusual of him. If he didn’t want to talk about it he’d say it from the beginning.

” why aren’t you being serious about this?” I asked in regards to his non challant behavior.

” How can she slip from my hands if she was never there in the first place?”

Then it clicked in.

He liked a girl whom he couldn’t have.

” why? What happened?” I didn’t need to explain my question because he understood fully what I meant and he gave me an answer.

” probably because she’s the mother to my cousins child. And I’m not going to be proud engaging in incest”

I felt a weight rest on my shoulders as I watched him.

It had been the same reason we had broken up. He claimed that it didn’t feel right.

Dylan had always had issues being intimate with me back then. I never knew why, we never had sex, shared only a few kisses and he avoided make outs.

I felt like it was cause he just saw me as a friend and wasn’t okay with going ahead.

Now I realize it’s cause Hunter is his cousin and sadly the closest one at that.

Hunter always has a way of ruining things for me doesn’t he?

” Dylan we-” I began to speak but a knock on the door interrupted our discussion.

After softly clearing my throat, I replied with a subtle come in.

The door opened, revealing a perfectly dressed Hunter in a suit.

He looked between Dylan and I for a few seconds before saying a good morning.

I think Dylan saw that as his cue to leave cause he stood to his feet and left us alone, not without leaving a kiss on my temple and a pat on Hunters back.

The two of us watched Dylan walk out till he shut the door and awkwardly, we stayed in a moment of silence before Hunter began to talk.

” Mr Reid called this morning. Scheduled a meeting for him and I tomorrow, hopefully he can give us a clue on Louisa ”

I only nodded and watched him. If he had nothing else to add then he can actually leave.

” Aunt Phoebe called some minutes ago. Said she tried Dylan but the line was busy.”

” did she leave any message for me?”

” she wants to speak with you later in the day, says she coming down tomorrow to see you ”

At least he delivered some good news. I really do miss Aunt Phoebe.

” okay. Thanks ”

” I’m heading to the office, is there anything of yours over there that you’d want me to bring back for you? Since… you know… you don’t work there anymore ” he almost seemed uncomfortable bringing it up but the earlier he faces the fact, the better.

” none that I remember but I’ll inform you if I do recall”

” oh?” He responded like he wasn’t expecting that as my answer ” uhmm… I’ll get going then. You want anything on my way back?” He asks again and I’m beginning to feel a lot wary of his good gesture.

” No. thanks ”

He nods and begins heading for the door, but abruptly turns around and speaks again.

” My mom said you should try coming out. That she’d love to take a walk with you to help clear your head”

” Tell her I’d love to. I need just a few minutes to freshen up” I say and stand to my feet, preparing to head for the bathroom because a long walk seems like a very good idea.

” okay ” were his last comments but I had already walked over to the closet to skim for the outfit I’d put on when I heard the door shut.

Only after he left did I notice that there was uneasiness in the atmosphere but it walked out the exact moment he did.

But even that wasn’t enough distraction from my conversation with Dylan.

Then again.. Dylan being who he is would never have this conversation again.