252
Axel
“I made a mistake, Sunshine,” a ball of emotion clogs my throat and I swallow it down, “I know I shouldn’t be asking you to forgive me, but-”
“Then don’t,” she puts a hand out in front of herself, like a stop sign, “don’t ask me to do it.”
I draw in a breath. “What will it take?” I force out the words through a throat gone dry, “What will it take for you to look past what I did?”
“I… I am not sure,” she says, still without looking at me.
“Please,” I force my tongue to form the words, “please, Theresa, tell me what I need to do to gain your forgiveness.”
She draws in a breath, then another. “I am not sure if you deserve to be forgiven,” she says in a soft voice.
“I don’t,” I roll my shoulders, “I know I acted like a stronzo.”
One side of her lips trembles before she purses her lips again.
My heart begins to race. Maybe there is a chance she’ll forgive me … Just maybe, we’ll find a way to move forward together. I rise to my feet and she glances at me. I skirt around the coffee table and take a step forward. She skitters to the side of the sofa. I move forward and she jumps up and edges sideways. I take in the glittery dress that she wears. I’d been too full of rage to actually register it at the nightclub, but now I notice how it dips at the cleavage and comes to mid-thigh. As she takes another step back it slides up to expose the pale skin of her upper thigh. Lust squeezes my belly. Anger knots my chest, “What are you wearing?” The words are out before I have a chance to stop myself.
She frowns, “If that was supposed to be an apology-”
“I know,” I raise my hand, “I know I am supposed to be groveling right now. And damn it, I came with the intention of throwing myself at your mercy. But the thought of anyone else having seen you dressed like this, the thought that all those men in the club would have seen your legs and the gorgeous hint of your cleavage, is driving me crazy.” I dig my fingers in my hair and tug. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, I am really screwing up things, aren’t I?”
Her gaze widens. She swallows audibly as she takes in my features.
“When it comes to you, I am helpless,” I murmur, “I look at you and all I can think is that you are mine. My wife. My property. Mine to do with as I want. Mine to protect and mine to fuck. Mine to love.”Content rights by NôvelDr//ama.Org.
Her breath hitches, her pupils dilate, and her chest rises and falls as she holds my gaze. She takes a step forward, then another. She reaches me, then lifts her hand and cups my cheek. “It shouldn’t appeal to me, you know, your brand of caveman possessiveness. It shouldn’t turn me on to get a glimpse of just how much you want to own me. I’ve grown up with the Mafia and I’ve always known that I’d marry into the mob, and yet,” she shakes her head, “yet, hearing the filthy words that emerge from your mouth appeals to something deep inside me. It’s frightening how much I respond to your overprotective nature. How the thought of you dominating me resonates so deeply within me. It’s why I have never been able to refuse anything to you.”
I peer into her face, take in her parted lips, the heightened color of her cheeks. I slide my hand inside my pocket and pull out her hair tie. I reach for the flowing mass of hair that streams around her shoulders and gather it on top of her head. Then I tie it into a ponytail that flows down to brush the small of her back.
“Is that my hair tie?” she cries
“I took it from you the very first time we met.”
“At the hospital, when that man broke in?”
I nod.
“You’ve been carrying it around all this time?”
The back of my neck heats.
“You have been carrying it around all this time,” she opens and shuts her mouth, “wow,” she shakes her head, “I mean, that’s-”
“Stupid,” I interject.
“Sweet,” she says in a soft voice.
“You turn me into a lovestruck fool, Sunshine,” I lower myself onto one knee and take her hand in mine. “You are my inspiration. You fill a void in me I didn’t even know I had. Since we’ve been apart, I’ve felt so hollow, like my life was already over. It’s as if when I walked away, I left my heart behind with you. Every time I breathe, it’s like razor blades are cutting through me. I can’t sleep, can’t eat, can barely focus on my job. All I want is to be near you, to spend all of my time with you, loving you, and proving to you how much I love you.”
“Wow,” she swallows, “that’s…that’s poetic.”
“I missed you.” I peer up into her features, “When I wasn’t with you, I went crazy with wanting you. All I wanted to do was reach out to you and hold you and kiss you and feel you, and have you melt into me, and hold you so tightly our skin fused together. And I know it won’t be easy to be together. I know I’ll drive you crazy with my over-the-top possessiveness. And I’ll want to control you, and possess you, and direct every aspect of your life, and when I overstep the line, you have my permission to tell me off.”
“I do?”
“You bet. Just tell me to sod off anytime I get too overwhelming for you. In fact, I want you to promise me you’ll let me know whenever I overstep.”
“O-k-a-y,” she tips her head, “though I am still not sure what you are saying.”
I slide my hand into my pocket, pull out a ring and slide it onto her finger.
“Oh,” she opens and shuts her mouth, “is that-”
“Marry me,” I murmur.
She glances down at the platinum band with the single emerald in an antique setting
“It was my mother’s,” I lower my head and kiss the ring on her finger, “and now it’s yours.”
Her chin wobbles and she stares at the ring for so long that I begin to worry.
“Theresa?” My heart begins to thump in my chest, “Will you be mine?”
A teardrop trails down her cheek, and my stomach ties itself in knots.
“Don’t cry, Sunshine, please. You know I can’t bear to see you in distress.”
“So why did you leave me?” she cries. “Why did you walk away from me?”
“I was foolish. I wasn’t thinking straight. All I could think was that he could have shot you. That I was responsible for pulling you into my world and painting a target on you. That if anything were to happen to you, I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself. It’s the moment I realized just how much I loved you, that you were my entire universe. I am nothing without you. Nothing. You are the reason I want to go on living. You are what makes everything worthwhile. You make me feel, you plug me into this world, you are the reason for my existence, Sunshine.”
She swallows; her chest rises and falls. More tears flow down her face. One of them hits my cheek and trails down. I lick it up.
“There’s something else.” I catch her eye before I continue, “If I ever try to pull something like this again, deciding you’re better off without me and not giving you any say in the matter, I want you to knock some sense into me. Remind me, I’m promising to never do that again.”
“I promise, I’ll let you know.” Then she laughs and shakes her head. “You’re crazy, you know.”
“Crazy about you.” I smile, then grow serious again. “And you’re mine.”
“I am,” she agrees.
“So, you’ll marry me?”
“I can’t,” she replies.
“What do you mean?”
“I was never not married to you, Axel. I was yours from the moment we met. I belong to you, only you.”